Leading with Courage – Competency #6
Recently I gave a speech at the annual conference of the Texas Association of College and University Student Personnel Administrators (TACUSPA). Its first title was “Courage to Serve.” I added a title later and, with apologies to Taylor Swift, called it “The Eras Presentation.”
I began with the story of my very first TACUSPA conference. I attended this conference in the fall of my first year as a professional in Student Affairs. It was held at a countrified resort in the Texas Hill Country that was further out in the country then than it is now. As it turned out that location was very important to my experience.
If we had been at any other location, I would have skipped the opening dinner. There was no sandwich shop anywhere near and no room service so if I wanted to eat, I had to go to the communal meals and sit with strangers and that was excruciatingly difficult for me at that point in my life. Of course, everyone was nice, but I still struggle with the mix and mingle in some settings and at that point in my life, I could barely cope.
I shared that story because I wanted to tell the people who were new to TACUSPA to give themselves credit for being there and to remind the people who come every year that it can be really difficult to join in a group like this. In other words, to do what I did that night took courage though I would never have called it that then. But taking that step into the unknown is courage and we should acknowledge it for ourselves and others.
Competency #6 is leading with courage and there are certainly times that senior leaders face decisions, take actions, or stand up for what’s right that require courage. One of the ways we develop the courage to make the hard decisions is by acknowledging all the different ways we have been courageous across our lives and careers. It helps us know we can take the next hard step when we remind ourselves we’ve done hard things before.
When I started at UTSA, I told my development director that I could certainly talk to donors about all the good stuff we were doing and the needs we had, but I had never done a “big ask” meaning asking a donor for a large donation. Sometime after that she attended a meeting with me, our president, the Athletic Director and a couple of others. We needed the president to say yes to our taking the next step to move the possibility of a football team at UTSA forward.
After the meeting, the Development director came up to me and said, “you don’t have to worry whether you can make a big ask. You just made a big ask and got the yes!” I’ve always appreciated her framing of that experience. She was right and her comment helped me have more confidence in the future. We can practice having courage on our way to leading with courage.
Bernard Weber has written one of my favorite children’s books entitled Courage. Its message is simple and profound. The book opens with:
“There are many kinds of courage.
Awesome kinds.
And everyday kinds.
Still courage is courage – whatever kind.”
He ends the book with, “Courage is what we give to each other.”
I en-courage you to take some time and look back to see where you have been courageous whether or not you thought of it as being courageous. Where did you successfully make a “big ask”. Where did you push yourself so far outside of your comfort zone that you weren’t sure you would make it through? When did someone tell you something you did seemed to be an act of courage? Understanding that we have been courageous in our past, giving ourselves credit for courage, helps us find the courage to do the next hard thing. Our history can teach us to lead with courage. If we let it.
Take care,
Gage